.Thursday, September 27, 2007 ' 1:36 AM Y
lose one friend, lose all friends, lose yourself
This is the emo entry that crazy people like me would dwell about it in the middle of the night at 2.00 a.m.
During my primary school, i was a talk cock kid that love to do stupid things in school. There was this girl came up to me and told me that if anyone in school was not my friend, then she must be ur enemy. Damn it, i too have alot of enemies because she was one of them! Put the record straight, i actually dun have much friends during my school days but i too indeed have alot of enemies.
Anyway, during my sec 1, i met this two friends, YL and Lu after i fell out with my best friend (stupid childish term to use on friends) cum neighbour cum travel kaki. YL and Lu came to me and i have two friends all of the sudden in sec 1 class. Anyway, i hate my sec 1 class because i have only one friend which i just mentioned above - the one that i have fell out with!
YL and Lu are the very goody christian kids and I tend to hang out more with Lu because well... she is pretty, innocent, sweet and blah blah blah.... and the most important thing is we can click bah...
Then after that, we promoted to sec 2 and i have a new clique to hang out with. I admit i didn't put enough effort to maintain the previous friendship because ..... well.... i guess in life, u will have to make tough choice to choose which clique u wish to hang out with bah... so i am also not exception lah!
Then blah blah blah and all of us graduated from secondary school. One day, i met YL on the street and she was damn cold towards me. Ok, so i asked her why and she told me that i changed alot - into someone aloof and cocky. WAH THE HECK! Then as i probed further, i realised that she was angry with me because i never reply her email which i never receive it lolx. So wadever, we clear up the misunderstanding and i asked about Lu. I came to find out that she dropped out of school and blah blah blah.... Ok, i was damn shock because how can anyone so innocent like Lu will change into .....? (
dude, i have to admit that i am naive!) Alot of things happened all these years, and now we are on different tracks with different personalities and so....
Then YL told me that Lu saw me the other day but she don't wish to come up to me because .... she think i would judge her! (
well.... she thinks both of us changed so much that probably no reason to talk anymore) Siao! Am i that shallow? I dunno... maybe, i am bah.... But i dun think i deserve to judge anyone lolx.
Just now, meiyi mentioned to me about this "judging friends" issues and i realised that i am also scare to be judge by friends. I am scare to judge by friends and so some things i just don't wish to tell but that doesn't mean i don't trust you guys.Actually, comes to think about it, i regret not telling you guys because i have to face stupid problems alone at that moments.... Anyway, i am meeting YL and Lu next sat (
wad sei.... first time meeting leh... abit nervous now) and i dunno how the gathering will turn out... i dunno what should i say? It might be warm welcome or cold silences.
Anyway, people always advise me to move on and i shouldn't be bother to look some old friends up but i just miss them and those fading memories. Well, probably the memories will remain or fade one day but the friends you have will no longer be the same....
